May 11th, 2008

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08:36 pm - Never underestimate the power of a mullet.
A post in jourdannex's LJ reminded me of a conversation I had with my hairstylist recently.

Jennifer (my stylist) confided in me cut-before-last that her current biggest frustration is men who come in, sit in the chair, and tell her they want their hair cut very short on the sides - like a #4 guard or so - short with bangs on the top, and down to the shoulderblades in the back. "But," they then tell her, "don't make it look like a mullet."

Are you as confused as I am? This is a request she gets FREQUENTLY. Which amazes me for any number of reasons.

  1. I really would not expect men who want mullets to be getting them at a place that charges $20 a cut
  2. What on earth do they think a mullet is?
  3. What do they think their mullet is, and how do they think it differs from a mullet?

There has got to be some kind of strange mullet etiquette that mere mortals such as myself (and my too-chic-to-want-to-cut-mullets stylist chick) wot not of. Something that divides the mullet from, I don't know, for lack of a better word shall we call it a catfish? Or maybe there's an entire ecosystem of redneck haircuts we just don't understand the subtleties of. Like Eskimos supposedly having twelve different words for "snow". For all I know I could walk into a SuperCuts and ask for a "bream" and be served with no further questions asked. A "crappie" certainly doesn't seem out of the question...

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(12 comments | Leave a comment)


[User Picture] From: clme
Date: May 12th, 2008 - 02:48 am
But did you talk to her about puking etiquette?

Oh yeah, mullets... I give you this:

[User Picture] From: discogravy
Date: May 12th, 2008 - 03:15 am
you have a hairstylist?

[User Picture] From: jimbojones
Date: May 12th, 2008 - 03:17 am
There is no point in trying to hide subtle implications in your posts with a mind-bogglingly sharp operator like you reading them. Nothing gets by!

[User Picture] From: discogravy
Date: May 12th, 2008 - 03:51 am
allow me to rephrase:
you're gay?

[User Picture] From: lisa_e_is_me
Date: May 12th, 2008 - 03:18 am
Heh...the crappie.

Yes, for some reason the mullet is still alive and well in the South. I don't understand it, because if I was able to stop wearing my hair in a gigantic sprayed winged monstrosity, you would think guys could give up their mullets. I hear they are prominent at Nascar races, but I will just have to take everyone's word on that.

I have to admit, though...back in the '80s, I pretty much only dated guys with mullets. I didn't seek them out, there were just more guys from that set to choose from. Behold, my first really serious boyfriend:


Charles sported one HELL of a mullet for a while, too, and I've got the pictures to prove it. Let's hope I never have a reason to use them.

[User Picture] From: jimbojones
Date: May 12th, 2008 - 03:20 am
I have seen far worse mullets.

Hell I will admit it: I have WORN a far worse mullet. But 1. it was the 80s and 2. I was 16 years old.

Unfortunately, 3. that is the picture on my dive license, and 4. those do not ever expire.

[User Picture] From: jimbojones
Date: May 12th, 2008 - 03:21 am
if I 5. admit your first serious bf looked damn good from the back, does that make me gay?

From: (Anonymous)
Date: May 12th, 2008 - 03:23 am

[User Picture] From: jimbojones
Date: May 12th, 2008 - 03:26 am
Well, I guess I can live with that. Better to dip a toe in the closet than to build a fort* in there.

* obviously, one with a No Girls Allowed! sign

[User Picture] From: lisa_e_is_me
Date: May 12th, 2008 - 01:09 pm
1. Anything that we did to our hair in the 80's is perfectly fine and nothing to be ashamed of, I say. 2. I will admit that I was a moth to flame when it came to 16 year old boys (or older) behind the wheel of a car, sporting a good mullet. That is actually how I met the guy in the photo - cruising the local park. Why does that sound dirty? It was DAYLIGHT on a Sunday! 3. I'll bet you loved that license picture, 4. until about 1990. 5. I think it just means you have excellent taste.

[User Picture] From: lindapendant
Date: May 12th, 2008 - 10:10 am
Seriously sexy physique cancels out mullet.

I am so fucking jealous of you right now.

(Icon. Sexy Back. Get it ?)

[User Picture] From: jimbojones
Date: May 12th, 2008 - 12:01 pm
Unless it's actually Lisa_E you're jealous of, no, I don't get it.

(And the ASCII cunnilingus icon you accidentally used before the edit cracked me up.)

[User Picture] From: lindapendant
Date: May 12th, 2008 - 01:36 pm
Yes, jealous of lisa_e's ability to attract some major beefcake.

(I stole that icon because I am a simpleton and it's funny in a gigawhat way. Feel free to nab.)

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