Zen Bastard (jimbojones) wrote,
Zen Bastard


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User Number: 400561
Date Created:11-24-2001
Number of Posts: 295

Jimbojones, also known (to no one but himself) as "the Zen Bastard," is a fictional internet character known for alternating bouts of introspective musing and brash extroverted storytelling.
Strengths: Unusual cross-genre audience-pleasing skills make it possible for shy, sweet girls to laugh gleefully at horrible stories about bodily fluids and potato chips and Manly Men to empathize with somber, emotional revelations.
Weaknesses: Full of self, perfectly capable of following up bouts of frenzied two-post-per-day volubility with three months of utter LJ silence, tends to hold "shift" key down while thinking for so long that the goddamned Accessibility thing pops up and tries to turn handicapped features on.  Fumes impotently at Windows' refusal to acknowledge the "never do this again" checkbox present in the aforementioned Accessibility dialog.
Special Skills: Professional systems administrator, knows just how your mom likes it.
Weapons: Interminable philosophizing, unstoppable sex appeal, pictures of your mom naked.
Natural Enemies: Shitty drivers (interstate), shitty drivers (computer hardware), overly complacent people.

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