February 25th, 2005

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01:40 pm - Deep Thoughts, with jimbojones
When someone perceives a flaw in a valuable object, there are three possible natural reactions:

1. to attempt to repair or work around the flaw, preserving the object's value
2. to reject the object as flawed and therefore unsuitable
3. to attempt to exploit the flaw or break the object

In different situations, different reactions make more or less sense - but most of us have a fairly heavy bias towards one of these reactions, being considerably more inclined towards it and away from the others... even when our preferred reaction isn't really very appropriate.  Selecting the appropriate response to a given scenario of this fundamental type is something that I've only recently recognized as a very real problem of mine, and have been trying to deal with.  My own bias is very, very strong, and - until now - almost entirely unexamined.  Dealing with it is a struggle.

I think most people have this problem; the major difference being which choice they're irrationally biased toward.  Which type are you?

Current Mood: armchair philosophical
Current Music: DJ Encore - I See Right Through To You (vocal mix)

(13 comments | Leave a comment)


[User Picture] From: katyakoshka
Date: February 25th, 2005 - 11:00 am
I tend towards option 1 with occasional forays into 3, but I've learned to rationally accept option 2 as the most appropriate. So much better at tossing unsalvageables than I used to be.

[User Picture] From: herbaliser
Date: February 25th, 2005 - 11:09 am
we're talking about people, right? Cos if we're talking about computers, my answer is different.

[User Picture] From: jimbojones
Date: February 25th, 2005 - 11:27 am
People can be objects.

If we were talking about your computer, I'd add a 4th answer "misconfigure it badly." ;-)

[User Picture] From: herbaliser
Date: February 25th, 2005 - 11:37 am
If the flaw is immediately discernable in the object, i tend to reject it immediately. If however the flaw is only noticeable after a certain period of time, I try to fix it. Of course I often try to fix it by means of strategy 3.

From: agentsteel53
Date: February 25th, 2005 - 11:24 am

[User Picture] From: jimbojones
Date: February 25th, 2005 - 11:26 am
"accept it as it is" falls under the category of "work around the flaw."

From: agentsteel53
Date: February 25th, 2005 - 11:28 am

[User Picture] From: zeldappa
Date: February 25th, 2005 - 12:30 pm
I tend to keep the object and "work around" or embrace the flaw. Extreme case in point, I lost my college ring last June and can't seem to bring myself to replace it since a new one won't be the same. So the flaw is that the ring is lost, but I still value it over a new one. (Geez, that sounds weird.)

I think a lot of it depends on the initial value you place on the object. I tend to reject the cheap, easily replaceable stuff once it's flawed. For example, if I wore a hole into a regular boring tshirt, I'd replace it. If I wore a hole into a regular boring tshirt that my college boyfriend gave me, I'll keep the shirt and just wear it at home. ... You know, not that I still wear a tshirt from a boyfriend from ten years ago or anything. ...

[User Picture] From: tawnyleona
Date: February 25th, 2005 - 01:50 pm
For inanimate objects, superglue works best for me.

And if glue or duct tape can't fix it, find someone else who wants it or toss it out.

For animate objects, I generally try option 1 first. In my dogs' cases, this is the only option, as I can't get rid of them (it would break my heart), nor is there any real way to exploit piles of shit lying around the house (if there is, someone PLEASE clue me in.) For people, it depends on how far into the relationship I realize the flaw. If I have investment in the relationship (which includes how deeply I feel for the person), I tend toward #1. If it's something I don't want to deal with, and I'm not heavily invested, I go toward option 2.

It also depends heavily on what type of "flaw" it is. If the flaw is the person is horrible at Literati, sure, I'll go for #3 and ask them to play me and get my rating up. But other than that sort of exploitation, I can't think of any that I would truly pursue.

[User Picture] From: freakout
Date: February 25th, 2005 - 03:44 pm
I am absolutely, 100% #1. This is why I am living in my parents house, while still dating my alcoholic bipolar husband (who, btw, is #3) despite the fact that he doesn't help me out with our daughter financially, emotionally or any other way. Until just now I didn't realize that this may be the same reason I got most of my furniture out of other people's trash.

[User Picture] From: jimbojones
Date: February 25th, 2005 - 03:46 pm
You'n'me both, Tina, you'n'me both.

Sorry your situation with your husband sucks so bad. I can definitely empathize. =\

[User Picture] From: mtu_squirrel
Date: February 25th, 2005 - 04:25 pm
Number 1 for evaluation purposes. If the flaws become way too apparent and difficult, I go to #2.

I'm attached to my vehicles and that, but if they don't run and i'm fixing it up every day... no way in hell i'm going to keep it. If it's a person... I'll try to work around flaws, or accept them, but when some are so blatantly bad that you know you can't stand being around them... I get rid of them.

#3... i'm not much on the exploits. Whether in video games, real life, etc.

[User Picture] From: fishpig
Date: February 25th, 2005 - 05:24 pm
#1 all the way, or a variety of same. I possess so many flawed "objects" that I don't feel I have the expertise, knowledge or wisdom to judge.
I'm aware how non-committal and (cringe) post-modern that sounds, but really...I love my faulty self, and my faulty friends.

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